He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Randomize
