I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
No subtext here. People are naked.
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
There's even glitter on my cock...
Randomize
