So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
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