I skipped work to stalk him.
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
no. you can't hotbox the world.
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
Randomize
