I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
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