This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
Randomize