He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
My vagina just recognized that song.
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
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