Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
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