My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
Randomize
