Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
it is my last wish that my tale be published posthumously as a warning to anyone thinking of eating burger king at nine am
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
