i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
