Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
I woke up to her staring at me in a corner moaning over and over again about how good the pie crust tasted
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Randomize
