How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
Randomize
