Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
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