We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
Randomize
