come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
