We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
you had me at cake vodka
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
