Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
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