you fell asleep during kickboxing this morning
how does that even happen??
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
they call him Oral-B. enough said
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Randomize