I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
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