What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
Phrase i just heard while watching the U.S. open: "Boy they have really trimmed it well, this has got to be the tightest hole in the Open."
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
Turns out I hooked up with a chick who has lupus. I don't know if that's a bucket list thing or not, but it's now on mine. Check.
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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