ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
I was so drunk last night i ate cereal with a fork.
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
The old woman next to me on the el smells like cupcakes...but she doesn't taste like cupcakes
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
Randomize
