I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
And on the way out from Applebee's he tried to take the basket of toothpicks claiming he was using them as a tax write off. Last time I babysit my dad on thirsty Thursday.
Randomize
