just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
Randomize
