so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
Randomize
