I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
He kissed a someone with a penis
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
Getting a high five from your dog when you're stoned is one the greatest rewards of being a pet owner.
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
Randomize
