If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
he thought i was a dude.
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
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