weddingsv make me drug and hornr
Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
So my ex just asked for my address to send me his wedding invitation... in Europe. Awesome.
That’s basically a green light to fuck his dad
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
So apparently I’m into choking now
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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