I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
Our house almost burnt down last night. I woke up at 4:10am to the smoke alarm going off bc the bean bag chair was on fire so i extinguished it and smoked a bowl at 4:20 to celebrate my fire extinguishing abilities
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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