My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
Your babysitter texted, wants me to pay with weed. I don't know where to get any & don't want to. Will she take cigarettes instead? Or um, cash? Like a person?
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Randomize
