It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
This beer is not sobering me up at all
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
Randomize
