i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
Well that's the second time I've broken a lamp during sex this month. Starting to worry I'm some kind of X-man. (this one was a wall sconce and I fully smashed it with my head and it crumbled like it was made of sugar)
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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