At least make sure they are 18
Why
Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
he was screaming in a recently acquired accent that he paid for delivery and they could cancel the entire order if they didn't come upstairs
I thought you said it was going to get worse not hilarious.
the delivery boy turned out to be my students mother. now she knows that i have incredibly low standards AND thanks to the fact that he still has dialup the pizza tracker was way off and she rang the bell and he answered mid bong rip.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
Delivery driver perk #327: I just paid for part of the security deposit on my new place in pizza. This oughta be a fun renting experience.
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
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