Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
Go christen that room with your naked body.
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
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