Her vagina should come with caution tape.
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
If there's one thing I think I could really excel it, it's curating a midlife crisis
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
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