ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
Remember when I use to call my dick 'the pendulum'
wtf?
It is now the artist formerly known as 'insideyourgirlfriend'
I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me
mondays should just be called national damage control day
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
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