epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
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