what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize
