I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
I'm laying in the fetal position on the floor of my kitchen eating potato salad with my fingers. Please come over with some real food and keep me company.
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
Randomize
