The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
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