So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
Randomize
