Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
