i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
Say something about gay babies.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Randomize
