i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
Just zoned back in to real life and found myself chanting "noodle eater noodle eater noodle eater" at my parrot as he devoured a single macaroni
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Randomize
