mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
I mean like, my liver will beg my brain for mercy. Brainll be like I'm Greg Jennings. Liverll be like I'm Darren Sharper. Brainll be like hold my diiiiick.
You can't just leave with hair like that
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
Randomize