Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
Today has been the most awkward masturbatory day of my life. Possibly even more awkward than when my mom found my vibrator on Mother's Day.
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
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