Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
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