if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
