My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
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