We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
I don't know whether to be insulted or flattered that I am being propositioned to have a threesome only if I wear my cat onesie
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Randomize
