Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
im sitting at a bagel shop wearing a princess crown hungover and have a sweater that is not mine.
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
Randomize
