Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
Randomize